Category: Memory

Music…

The Show

Lenka

Lenka

and Words

I’m just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don’t know where to go, can’t do it alone
I’ve tried and I don’t know why

Slow it down, make it stop or else my heart is going to pop
‘Cause it’s too much, yeah it’s a lot to be something I’m not
I’m a fool out of love ’cause I just can’t get enough

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

It was 1982 when I first became interested in baseball.  I was fourteen at the time and for many years baseball was simply the hard wall that officially signaled the end of the Saturday morning cartoons.  A few times I watched as the games started in these impossibly green fields and abundant sunshine.  I learned some of the terms through mere absorption; much like I learned the names of historically good teams like the Yankees and the Dodgers.  In fact, the Dodgers defeated the Yankees just the year before.

This year a little team dared to dream; the Atlanta Braves had endured many miserable years of poor baseball.  In 1981 they finished next to last in the National League West division.  Consequently, they had no reason to believe that they’d do any better, except that they did.

Continue reading “For Love of the Game” →

Music…

Do They Know It’s Christmas?

Do They Know It’s Christmas?

Band Aid

and Words

It’s Christmas time
There’s no need to be afraid
At Christmas time
We let in light and we banish shade

And in our world of plenty
We can spread a smile of joy
Throw your arms around the world
At Christmas Time

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

It’s the winter of 1984, and there’s a little song that gets increasingly more air play.  Both the local radio stations and MTV play it.  Music was my refuge and I listened (and watched videos), but somehow this song and its video was different.  This song is both familiar and different.  I hear vocals from many voices which I recognize, but the name ‘Band Aid’ is not one I recognize.  The video similarly has a collection of many artists all collaborating on this one project.  That song, of course, is “Do They Know It’s Christmas?”

Continue reading “My favorite Christmas song” →

Music…

You’re My Heart, You’re My Soul

The First Album

Modern Talking

and Words

Deep in my heart, there’s a fire, a burnin’ heart
Deep in my heart, there’s desire for a start
I’m dying in emotion
It’s my world in fantasy
I’m livin’ in my, livin’ in my dreams

You’re my heart, you’re my soul
I keep it shining everywhere I go
You’re my heart, you’re my soul
I’ll be holding you forever
Stay with you together

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

I felt liberated upon graduating high school.  Everything was rushing until the very end, only to be followed by an abrupt and eerie silence.  I coasted for about a month.  I bused or waited on tables for a bit, but not anything that I really remember.  In some ways that summer was transformational.  I survived high school by integrating into the realm of everyone.  Never did I prostitute my values, but I wasn’t really being who I really was; I wasn’t my most authentic self.  Though that was largely driven by the simple fact that I didn’t know who I really was.  There were very few people like me in my high school, and basically no one with the same experiences.

Continue reading “Finding my kin, among a dozen dance floors” →

Music…

Pac-Man Fever

Pac-Man Fever

Buckner & Garcia

and Words

I got a pocket full of quarters, and I’m headed to the arcade.
I don’t have a lot of money, but I’m bringing ev’rything I made.
I’ve got a callus on my finger, and my shoulder’s hurting too.
I’m gonna eat them all up, just as soon as they turn blue.

‘Cause I’ve got Pac-Man fever;
Pac-Man fever.
It’s driving me crazy.
Driving me crazy.

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

This was me circa 1983; I won’t deny it.  I lived near the Grand Prix Race-O-Rama; they claimed that they were the World’s Largest Arcade.  I spent more hours at Grand Prix that I care to admit; it embarrasses me to this day.  I wasn’t able to drive then, so I either got a ride from my sister or rode my bicycle there.  When I did the latter, it took me the better part of an hour but did it happily.

Once there, it was my refuge; it was this fifteen-year-old’s Nirvana.  It housed multiple gigantic rooms with stand-up arcade games that lined the walls packed tightly, separated by only inches.  The centers of each room were outfitted with row upon row of cocktail table versions of the same arcade games.  The rooms were illuminated by the glow from each screen as each game was played or they continued in ‘point of sale’ mode.  The sound on each arcade game was configured so that you could near it, but it didn’t overwhelm anyone else’s playing.  The effect was that the entire room was bathed in kaleidoscope of lights from these screens and their sound effects.  Their combination was both never precisely the same, but it was always there and always consistent.  It became the soundtrack to my teenage years in a twisted way.

Continue reading “Becoming the master of my own world, in 25¢ increments” →

Music…

Without You

Nilsson Schmilsson

Harry Nilsson

and Words

No, I can’t forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess that’s just the way the story goes
You always smile but in your eyes your sorrow shows
Yes, it shows

No, I can’t forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrow
When I had you there but then I let you go
And now it’s only fair that I should let you know
What you should know

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

I know this may seem surreal, but the first time I heard a rendition of this song, it was a Spanish cover.  Based strictly on the time released, we must have been in Puerto Rico.  More than once did I try to find that particular rendition, though sadly I was never able to track it down.  I didn’t quite remember the artist nor the name of the song in Spanish.  I mostly remember the first few notes which set the tone for the remainder of the song.

Continue reading “Why does agony make us feel alive?” →

Music…

Never Had

10 Years (Soundtrack)

Oscar Isaac

and Words

I’ve been gone for.. so long now
Chasing everything that’s new..
I’ve forgotten how I got here
I’ve not forgotten you..

We were just children, with our eyes opened, and
You were all that I could see
You came close enough to know my heart-beat, but
Still not close enough for me..

Lyric excerpts from Genius.com.

I could tell stories of great romances in high school.  There are great tales of great spiritual synchronicity or emotional belonging with a soulmate.  I can recount the extraordinary circumstances by which a young woman and I were thrown together by fate.  Sadly, they’d all be lies.  My time in high school was socially awkward and even attended my own prom stag.

I was ambitious and generally happy in high school; my friends mostly accepted me for who I was.  I remain in contact with many of them.  Naturally, I had great interest in a number of young women but sadly never worked up the courage to approach them romantically.  It may seem uneventful and maybe a little sad, but it’s the truth.  I suspect many stories of high school were precisely like this.

Continue reading “A missed connection with that high school crush” →

Music…

Tubthumping

Tubthumper

Chumbawamba

and Words

Truth is, I thought it mattered
I thought that music mattered
But does it? Bollocks!
Not compared to how people matter

We’ll be singin’
When we’re winnin’
We’ll be singin’

I get knocked down, but I get up again
You’re never gonna keep me down

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

It was early in my career at Microsoft, and I worked on a project in the audio team.  I teamed up with a young intern who would be continuing my project; his name was Dan.  As we continued to meet in order to hand off the existing project, we got along fabulously.  We both had similar wit and complemented each other’s working style.  It was the start of an enduring friendship.

Continue reading “Pissing the night away?” →

Music…

More Than Words

Extreme II: Pornograffiti

Extreme

and Words

Saying I love you
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It’s not that I want to
Not to say, but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel

More than words
Is all you have to do to make it real
Then you wouldn’t have to say that you love me
‘Cause I’d already know

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

It is 1991 at the University of Miami.  This is my fifth year to get two bachelor’s degrees, one in computer science and one in engineering.  The school charges the same tuition rate for all full-time students (between twelve and eighteen credits).  In order to maximize my tuition money, I would load up on as many classes as I could.  Therefore, it has been four straight years of seventeen credit semesters; that’s at least five classes.  Then upon finishing classes on Fridays, it is waiting on tables on weekend evenings, that is Friday through Sunday.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

Continue reading “The pure beauty of one quiet moment” →

Music…

Hotel California

Came Traveling

Sam Hui

and Words

On a dark desert highway
Cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas
Rising up through the air

Up ahead in the distance
I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy, and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

It was 1978, and my dad passed away nearly a year before.  I stayed for the remainder of that school year in Puerto Rico, but we moved shortly after finishing that grade.  I barely knew how to speak English; in fact, I failed English when I took it in Catholic school.

Upon my finishing third grade in Puerto Rico, we moved to Florida where my mom enrolled my younger sister and I into a bi-lingual (Spanish and English) classroom.  Before we learned to adapt to living without my father, our mom yanked us from that environment and thrusted us into a new location (country even, though Puerto Rico is a US commonwealth), with a new language, and no childhood friends.

Continue reading “I can check out anytime, but never leave” →

Music…

Endless Summer Nights

Richard Marx

Richard Marx

and Words

Summer came and left without a warning
All at once I looked and you were gone
And now you’re looking back at me
Searching for a way that we can be
Like we were before

Now I’m back to what I knew before you
Somehow the city doesn’t look the same
I’d give my life for one more night
Of having you here to hold me tight, oh, please
Take me there again, whoa-whoa

Lyric excerpts from Musixmatch.

Upon graduating high school, I got a new-for-me car, a 1966 Ford Mustang.  The car was two years older than I and I named her Lisa.  She was painted metallic blue, as have been most of my cars.  Lisa had short bucket seats with running ponies; that option was called ‘Pony interior’.  Under the hood was a 289 V-8.  I loved that car.  While this may sound shallow, Lisa contributed to my identity for those years while I drove her.

Continue reading “She was two years older and my companion for years” →